From One Peninsula to the Next
As much as I thought I did, I really had no idea what I was doing when I decided to up and leave Michigan. So unapologetic. So abrupt. Somehow, in my blind desire to get a job and kick-start my career, I left behind a whole lot.
After I collapsed the boxes and settled into my new home, it hit me like a brick: “So, what now?” The friends I’d had for the past several years of my life had suddenly disappeared. Kind of like that cruel prank of pulling the rug out from under someone. The teacher’s taken the eraser to the whiteboard, and it’s time to start over, yet again. It’s like starting college, all over again. You leave your friends from home, step into a foreign landscape, and hope to make some new friends even though you preemptively assume they could never replace those from home. Remove the social environment the classrooms, dorms, organizations and sports provided and it’s even tougher. And I honestly believe being in a place like Florida makes it even harder yet. People here aren’t like people from Michigan, and that’s not necessarily a bad thing, it’s just different. When I tell someone I went to U of M, they respond, “Oh, Miami?” It’s hard to describe, but you really just lose that mid-western feel.
And as much as I thought I wouldn’t, I had no idea how much I’d miss wearing a scarf. Michigan’s little quirks are something to live for, I’m telling you. The blustery, colorful falls, the crackling fire to combat the heart-stopping cold. Curling up with a warm blanket, hot cocoa and a good book in 70-degree weather just won’t be the same. Now, I know, I know Michiganders, 70-degree weather in October and November rocks, but can you honestly tell me you’d rather not see a single day of snow? I often wonder if the lack of change in seasons here leaves one in a timeless state of mind, unable to move forward, stuck in a perpetual state of stasis… but I digress.
At the same time, much of this comes from that deceptive little memory quirk called nostalgia. When back in Michigan, there were plenty of reasons I could list to leave, and going back there, I’m sure they’ll resurface. For now though, it’s hard - but I’m tackling it, and experiencing small victories. BarCamp Orlando and blogOrlando last week were great events in their own, geeky right, but they were even better for meeting new people. I’m starting to find that among all of these Floridians, I’m not the only one down here who longs for the comforts of the mitten state, and that, perhaps, has been the most comforting feeling I’ve felt in a while.
[For those of you back in ol’ Ann Arbor, I’ll be coming back for the weekend of the Ohio State game, November 17 and 18, and will be back in Holland for the following week. You have no idea how excited I was to get that time off from work.]
For those of you that have left home/the midwest, what has your experience been like?
10 Comments, Comment or Ping
Laurie
Hey Bill, I hear you. It’s been beautiful here all week. In southeast Michigan, we have about 50% color right now, and it will be in the 80s today. I’m hoping for a cider mill & donuts venture this weekend.
Oct 5th, 2007
LauraFries.com
I hear you, Couch. I’m going through a similar experience, being back in Atlanta. Do I really want to leave my friends and start over again? Is it worth it?
Being around people who care about you is priceless.
Oct 5th, 2007
George Riddell
As someone who escaped… er moved away from Michigan 27 years ago, I have to say “You’ll Get Over It”! It’s natural to miss the things you are used to and comfortable with. But true growth as a person can only come when you step outside that comfort zone and experience new things. Since leaving Michigan in 1980, I have lived in six different cities in four states. Each time I moved on I experienced both the sadness of leaving friends and familiarity behind, and the exhilaration that comes with anticipating a new adventure.
Embrace the change Couch! Believe me, the homesickness will pass. And in its place you will find your life to be richer and your outlook worldlier.
Oct 5th, 2007
Alex Rudloff
You can always travel to go see some snow ;)
I think the only season I miss from my short time outside of Florida is Fall. I had never seen the trees change color and never really got the whole colors-associate-to-seasons thing.
Down here, we kind of have two seasons… Amazingly awesome, and too-damn-hot.. We’re just now leaving too-damn-hot and heading into amazingly awesome… It should last from about mid-october to about early july. Hope you can find enjoyment in it!
Oct 5th, 2007
William Couch
@laurie you’re still making me jealous, but I found some gourds here from Michigan, and have some apples in my fridge, so I guess that helps…
@laurafries too true.
@georgeriddell I’m not really worried about it - and I’m all for getting out and meeting new people. Rather, I didn’t think about the social change that’d happen in making such a move.
@alexrudloff Oh, I’ll be going to Boston in a week, and Michigan in November, so that should cool things down a bit… ;) I do look forward to the cooler, more comfortable days that I’ve heard so much about.
And as a side note, longing for Michigan is not a result of my job. I am still fully loving my job.
Oct 6th, 2007
megan
billy boy! i’m still in the midwest, and to me people say, ‘oh, university of minnesota?’ i have a rep for being a wild-and-crazy michigan fan already. :) it is a little easier for me, though, because i did keep that midwestern aspect. but as previously mentioned, life’s still a bitch…. when you’re in holland you should call me. i’m done with school on the 20th and will probably come home to visit sometime that week.
Oct 6th, 2007
Eston
This post seriously resonates with me, and I’m happy to know that all of us are experiencing the same thing right now.
I, too, have moved from one Peninsula to another — in my case, to Palo Alto — and I am longing for the same things you are. Today was the first day where I needed to wear a sweatshirt outside, the first day when my fingers were actually slightly numb, and I loved it. I really miss the Michigan fall, the football games at Michigan Stadium, the exams and classes, and the smell of burning leaves.
The thing that I miss the most, however, are the people. As much as I love my job and the things I can now have because of it, I have pretty much lost the people that were always there for me, the people I could run to the pizza place with at 2am, mash on DDR pads with and have bubble tea, and share a mocha with at the State & Liberty Starbucks when I’m wanting to get in from the cold. I have not laughed as much, I have not had anywhere nearly as good of a time, I have not really had anywhere near the camaraderie I’ve had with the people that I left in May, and I miss that — and subsequently long for that — more than anything else. Yes, I am now what the world considers successful; I am influencing a growing number of people (We’re at 40 million something now,) I am actually, truly independent, but it’s sad that that independence has also turned into more solitude than I would actually like.
It’s funny because if there’s one thing I’m quickly learning about my own life, it’s that I suffer from a serious amount of “grass is greener” syndrome. I have noticed that I constantly seem to take for granted the things that seemed normal to me, and now I think I’m much more appreciative of that. We have been influenced by this constant yearning for opportunity and progress, this chasing the carrot instead of being bashed with the stick, and in the end we are so hurriedly rushed through our lives to progress to whatever the next stage we’re supposed to be in that we rarely stop and realise what is around us.
Right now I’m not worried about progress; I’m perfectly happy with the progress I’ve made and the position I’m in now. The only progress I think all of us need to make at this point is filling the huge void that, unfortunately, you’re never taught how to deal with in college.
Oct 7th, 2007
Josh Windisch
Wow, I just started reading your blog (on an iPod Touch too, by the way, and this entry was really well written!! Good job on this. I’ve started a blog too, but it’s all mac related stuff for the most part. Anyway, you brought up something that I really want to do, and that is get to some geeky tech conferences. I hope to get to a podcamp sometime soon and maybe, just maybe…Macworld one day. Well it was good hearing from ya, and I added you on twitter too. Keep writing!
Nov 2nd, 2007
Shoshana Walter
Hey Couch! Michigan-ers are not the only ones who miss wearing scarves here in the sunshine state.
The first few days I was here, I wore scarves everyday. It’s something I did at home, even when it wasn’t cold. It was just sort of fashionably acceptable.
It hit me one day in November. I was browsing a woman’s garage sale in 80 degree Floridian heat when she asked me if I was cold. At first I just sort of laughed, wondering why she had asked — of course I wasn’t cold.
Then I realized she had asked because I was wearing a scarf. That might seem obvious to some people but it wasn’t to me.
All that to say, even though I’m from dirty Jerz, I understand what you’re going through. And it has to do with a lot more than winter accessories.
Holler at me sometime, will you? I’m only an hour away!
Jan 13th, 2008
Jamal Fanaian
Well, I would like to say welcome to Florida. Just remember, its not too bad here. We don’t get many frozen nights, and no snow at all. I understand the nostalgic feeling too. I left Dominican Republic as a teenager when my family decided to move here. It was a harsh move, and at the time I really wanted to do it. I was excited to be in the US, and to experience all the opportunities I would have here. It has definitely been great to be here. I do miss my friends often enough, I even dream about visiting them all the time. I try to keep in touch with them too but its hard.
Sometimes I wonder though, is the nostalgic feeling just remembering the good times? I can’t really recall my negative views of being there but I’m sure there were many. Just like you mentioned, going back would probably make me remember all the reasons I wanted to leave.
Good luck in Florida!
Jan 31st, 2008
Reply to “From One Peninsula to the Next”